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Epstein the Russian Asset

By Moshi, Hokosu Fugazi

Epstein the Russian Asset

Uncle Jeff was a Russian asset is my favorite new lie.

The last few days disturbing new information is coming from the Epstein Files. Uncle Jeff was a Russian Asset.. The evidence is overwhelming. For starters, Vlad said he was TRAINED AS A SPY, and Vlad was even seen sneaking into Jeff’s NYC mansion, (face covered)..

Ahhh shit sorry, I messed that up. It was former Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Barak who said he was trained as a spy. And Ehud, who was sneaking into his house. 

My bad. But still, definitely a Russian spy.. I mean think of the old story about Robert Maxwell. (the father of Jeffrey’s partner in crime). When he kicked the bucket, he didn't just get a normal send-off, he got a full-state funeral in Moscow, attended by the heads of Russian intelligence like he was a national hero. According to famous KGB agent Ari Ben-Menashe the theory is that Jeffrey and his girlfriend "inherited" this whole KGB honey-pot operation like a family business…

Damnit. I got that wrong again! He was buried at the Mount of Olives in Jerusalem, and was sent off with dozens of high ranking Mossad agents, and government officials. And of course Ari, was former Mossad, not KGB.

Maybe you see where this is going. But it is still plausible that Epstein worked for both Russia and Israel. Which somehow does not make things any better, considering our sitting president has more pictures with the guy than me and my own grandfather, or that he is mentioned over 30,000 times in the files. I mean what the actual fuck. 

Hanging out with sex-trafficking, pedophiles is not inherently criminal I suppose, but tbh, I don’t love it. 

Also, one last note.. Why the hell is this information not on every news platform in the country?

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